My darling child (whom I love more than the air I breathe and the life I have been given) has been sick for days now and it has taken its toll on me.
Tonight is the 5th night in a row that he has been down and out. I know he didn’t plan it. I know he is just little and I know that one day I will want him to wake up in the middle of the night and want ME to be the one to take care of him. I am sure there will be nights that I cry because he won’t let me bring him chicken soup or rub his back and kiss his forehead while I take his temperature. But, right now…at this very moment…I have had just about enough of this crap.
I haven’t slept for more than 45 minutes at any one time since he got sick. My bed is full of kid germs and nose crust…even though I have been changing the sheets daily. My back has permanent indentations where his feet have been pushing against my kidneys while he sleeps in my bed at night. Everywhere I go, I am picking up dirty tissues and popsicle wrappers. My life revolves around wiping boogies and medication schedules.
Also, I get it that his “nose doesn’t come out” and that every little thing irritates him. I get it that he, like every other male in the world, is whiny and needs waited on hand and foot when he is feeling ill. I get all of these things…
But for the love of God, can I get a break? Can I sleep? Can I NOT pick your boogies off the sleeve of my shirt? Will you PLEASE stop whining…just for an hour so that my brain can learn to recognize other sounds? PLEASE!
Yes, I am whining…Yes, I sound like a wretched mother…Yes, I am too tired to care. Yes, tomorrow is a new day and yes, my patience and tolerance levels will be replenished…but for now…for now….I am going to go pour myself an extra big glass of wine and hopefully drift peacefully off to sleep and say a little prayer along the way that he does the same…for the betterment of everyone we come in contact with!